"dark lipstick makes you look intimidating"
good. stay the hell away from me.
i just said hi to someone and they didn’t hear me i’m never trying that again
me: *drinks water* health god
"you can’t be just friends with people of the gender you’re attracted to"
myth actually true. i, as a bisexual, can confirm that i have no friends.
pansexuals spend their lives in solitude, with only rocks for company
meanwhile asexuals are friends with everyone. literally every single person on the planet. i do not know how i remember so many names
My little brother and I were swimming and my dad walked out and said “it’s trash day tomorrow you know what that means” and my brother looked at me dead in the eyes and said “it’s time for you to go.”
is it wrong to be in love with an electric car
taking selfies of your face with the flash on is the #1 way to destroy confidence
Can everyone just be like Dylan?
if i’m on top of your snapchat best friends, i assume you want me on top of you
Moan into my mouth while I finger you when we kiss.
rub your stomach while you pat your head